Rectal foreign body - butt plug
"Really? I can't imagine how it got there..."
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Abdominal x-ray demonstrates a density in the pelvis with a surrounding similar density coating separated by an air cavity. It is roughly conical in shape with a narrow waist. The splenic flexure of the colon is distended. Not the incidental large nipple rings.
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Perhaps attaching these to a surfboard leash, with a Velcro around the ankle, may help...